I was watching What Not to Wear a couple weeks ago (as I admittedly do every week) and their protégéthat week, Amanda, was a mom blogger. A mom blogger that doesn't spend any time taking care of herself. Hmmm...I think I can relate. The episode was their typical mom-must-take-care-of-herself-too, i.e., mom-is-important-and-deserving-too, tone. But Amanda had an epiphany toward the end of her transformation that really hit home with me -- our kids are learning body image and how to treat themselves by watching their moms, even the boys (Amanda is mom to three boys, bless her heart). I would be heartbroken if either of my kids thought of themselves the way I think of myself. I have to learn to love this body. I don't have a clue how, but I have to show my children that I'm proud of who I am.
Now, this shared epiphany from Amanda somewhat collided with an offer of a fancy dress to review. When Shabby Apple approached me, wanting to send me a dress to review on this blog, I felt conflicted. This is not a fashion blog, yet I wanted to wear that beautiful dress. Then it struck me, wearing that dress on a night out without kids, a night for me, would be "taking care of mom," something most of us, especially moms of special needs kids, need to do more of.
And so the plan was hatched. Shabby Apple sent me this beautiful silk dress from their Silk Road line. My sister and I made plans for a girls' night out -- something we vow to do much more often than we make time for. This dress to review forced me to finally make good on our plans. Yay!
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We went to dinner at a local Tapas restaurant (with a great coupon from Groupon) and ate some fancy food. Yum! Then we walked over to the French Broad Chocolate Lounge and stepped into what my sister and I would consider the perfect place, an establishment with nothing but loads and loads of chocolate. And there, over chocolate, our heads in the clouds, we hatched a plan for a moms-only pajama party where we'll eat lots of chocolate and watch a marathon of Friends episodes together. That's the plan this weekend.
I must admit, I felt very self-conscious in that dress. It's part of that terrible body image I'm going to work on. But I also felt young again (reminded me of my single days many moons ago) and special. It was good to push myself and step out of my comfort zone. That recharge was most definitely good for my kids too.
I'm having coffee with other moms parenting kids with ADHD twice a month now too. While we do talk all about our kids and rarely just about ourselves, it still feels like something I'm doing for myself.
What do you do to take time for yourself to model a positive self-worth?
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I highly recommend the fashion from Shabby Apple. They have something for all styles and all body types (you can even shop by body type to help select the most flattering shapes for your body).
If you want to read more from Amanda, deliverer of my latest ah-ha moment, check out her blog, parenting BY dummies. I promise she's good for a laugh.
You can also purchase artisan chocolates and handmade deserts from French Broad Chocolate Lounge by mail. Trust me, if you love chocolate, you won't regret it.
Penny Williams is the creator and editor of {a mom's view of ADHD}. She is also a freelance writer, real estate broker, wife, and mother of two living in Asheville, N.C. She has published several pieces in ADDitude Magazine, the #1 national publication dedicated to ADHD, and has also been quoted in Parenting.com's Family Health Guide on ADHD and The High Desert Pulse article, When Ritalin Works. When not writing, she can usually be found behind a camera.